How To Say Nothing In Five Paragraphs

I got the following email today from Sen. Kay Hagan (D-NC) regarding efforts in Congress to remove the authority of the Environmental Protection Agency under the Toxic Substances Act to manage lead in ammunition, bullets, and fishing tackle. While I don’t actually remember writing her on this subject, I must have done so.

If you read the entire letter, nowhere in it does she say where she stands on the subject at hand. She’s happy to hear from me and wants me to continue to share my opinions with her. She says she is moderate and bipartisan. She says she supports the military and has military ties in her family. Blah, blah, blah.

What makes this banal email from her even more frustrating is that she is a co-sponsor of the bill in question. You would think if she got an email or letter asking her to support the bill, she would tout the fact that she not only supports the bill but is a co-sponsor.

This letter should be used in training classes for PR hacks as example of how to use spin on your constituents.

All I can say is that 2014 can’t get here soon enough.

July 19, 2011

Dear Friend,

Thank you so much for contacting my office in regards to the Hunting, Fishing, and Recreational Shooting Protection Act (S.838). I greatly appreciate hearing from you, and I hope you continue to share your opinions and ideas with me. I am honored to represent North Carolina in the United States Senate, and it is important to me that my office is open and accessible.

Whenever I am asked to evaluate an issue, I look at all perspectives and interests so I can make the most informed decisions possible. I have always felt that elected officials should do more to work across the aisle to pass legislation that benefits all Americans. I have strived to promote bipartisanship among my colleagues in the Senate, and I pledge to continue working with individuals from all political backgrounds as I champion the interests of North Carolina.

I take great pride in my moderate record, both in the United States Senate and the North Carolina Senate. Throughout my career in public service, I have been particularly dedicated to advocating for middle-class families, making sure our children have access to quality education and promoting fiscal responsibility. North Carolina is the most military-friendly state in the nation, and I will work to continue this tradition. My own family has a strong military background, and I am so proud of our brave men and women serving in the armed forces.

As legislation comes before Congress, please feel free to contact me with your concerns, questions, and ideas. I have always said that constituent service comes first. As I tackle issues in the Senate that are important to our state, I want as much input as possible from the citizens of North Carolina.

Again, thank you for contacting my office. It is truly an honor to represent North Carolina in the United States Senate, and I hope you will not hesitate to contact me in the future should you have any further questions or concerns.

Sincerely,

Signature

Kay R. Hagan